Lies My Mother Told Me: Tall Tales from a Short Woman

“When you’re invited to a dinner party, you should always be prepared with three good stories to tell.”
-Joan Rivers

But my mother never said those stories had to be true….

Welcome to the official website of mother, TV Producer, Red Carpet Fashion Expert & New York Times Best Selling Author Melissa Rivers.

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Group Text with Melissa Rivers

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Melissa’s podcast where she shares whatever she and her friends are texting about…this includes everything from fashion on the Red Carpet and the annoying number of “reboots,” to being an empty nester and so much more. Hear unvarnished truths from some of the funniest and best in the business. You won’t want to miss this!

#JoansJokes

Remember, formal occasions are really just informal ones with uncomfortable clothes.

ENTERTAINING

I stepped on my talking scale and it told me to come back when I’m alone.

DIETING

I don’t mind being hit by Cupid’s arrow, as long as the tip was dipped in Botox.

VALENTINE’S DAY

Winter has been so cold, my breasts froze to my knees.

WINTER

I thought I was getting a terrific suntan, but it turned out my liver spot had just grown.

SUMMER

It’s inconsiderate that Memorial Day kicks off the unofficial outdoor barbecue season, but never includes a tribute to Joan of Arc.

SUMMER

She’s kissed so many sailors, her lips go in and out with the tide.

FLEET WEEK

Latest News

Table Talk is where I sit down and rant about things I love and the things that drive me insane.

This time my husband Steve joined me, who happens to be a lawyer, as we dissect all things The Traitors.

You can check out the full video on my YouTube channel at melissariversofficial.
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This is what happens when your husband takes a day to work from home.
#outtakes #bloopers
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Hot take incoming.

Michael Rapoport was right… just not right about how he said it.

Colton Underwood, The Traitors, and the moment that split the internet, @davidyontef of @behindvelvetrope and I are breaking it all down on #grouptext.

New episode out now. Link in bio.
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Tomorrow on #grouptext @davidyontef from @behindvelvetrope and I go deep on all things Traitors. I’m obsessed with this season. Are you watching? ...

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Today we remember Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and this quote is one that always stays with me. ...

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Everyone throwing it back to 2016, but I personally prefer 1996. The late ‘90’s was a time! This is baby me on one of the first red carpets interviewing the incredible Emily Watson. ...

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When @avoyermagyan reached out to me about buying my mother’s bee pin at the auction a few months back and then having Patrick Schwarzenegger wear it at the Golden Globes in honor of my mother, I was absolutely touched. I had no idea this was the case when I declared Patrick one of the best dressed men on the red carpet.

Thanks to Avo for making my day. He’s the real deal and no wonder he’s been tapped as one of the best stylists today.
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If you’ve been wondering what really happened between Venita and Craig…

This conversation brings the clarity. Link in bio!

#GroupText #bravo #southerncharm
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